...the last first day...

okay, so how many time have you started a dieting, eating healthy and/or exercising after letting your body roam free and graze on the fields of horrible food choices or  sit comfortably in the lap of a sedentary lifestyle. That first day of getting into things, knowing "this is the first day... I'm only going to get better from this point".   Well... that is my TODAY... and I'm sick of having hundreds of these first days...  I am ready to be done!  I want to get things under control once and for all.  not to think that I am NEVER going to get off track or struggle, but I'm sick of the DAY ONE after letting myself get so far off track. 

I feel with the medicinal help I've been receiving, this is a possibility.  I don't feel as though I've got as far to dig out of this hole, I don't feel like there is an anvil tied to my ankle pulling me down... I feel (AND KNOW) that  I can do this.  I think that the depression has had me in such a deep "funk" that no matter how much I wanted to get things under control and in order, it wasn't going to happen without first dealing with the "UGGGGGG" that my body, mind and spirit have been crushed under.

I have a plan in place and I'm ready!!!!  I'm not willy-nilly... I'm not doing this half way.  I'm taking control.     This is it... ready to begin again... ready to make it last... ready to finally overcome this body that I've been lugging around...    HERE'S TO ME!!!  I deserve this, I'm worth this... It is utterly, amazing how you can get to the point where you aren't even a priority in your own life, and I know that was where I was. 

...it's me time...